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celebrity crushes: Freddie Mercury, Leonard Nimoy, and Jesus

Why do we get celebrity crushes?  Clearly part of the reason has to do with their charisma.  And partially, because they are icons, we can project all kinds of desirable traits and characteristics onto them.  Then we might feel like we actually know them.  They may be physically attractive either in a sexual attraction kind of way or in an envious or inspirational kind of way.  So we feel an intense  desire to know them.  Celebrities can be good role models or not. I occasionally get the girl crush but my heavy-hitter big celebrity crushes happen to be men:  Freddy Mercury, Leonard Nimoy, and Jesus .  Now don't get all riled up about the Jesus thing I will explain it later, let's just start with Freddy Mercury.

It is not unlike me to get a crush on a gay man.   You may analyze it all you want but I know I am not the only woman who does that.  Although sometimes I think I am a gay man trapped in a woman's body.  But Freddie Mercury's looks and the way he moved were universally mesmerizing.  I absolutely love his overbite - it is unique and sexy because it gave him his spectacular singing voice.  He may not have been a role model of healthy lifestyle but he was sexy in an extravagant bad boy kind of way, and of course crazy talented.   Yet I think he must have been a sensitive soul and definitely a creative soul. I think creativity is ultimately sexy and til his dying day all he wanted was to make music - no matter how sick he got.  He had passion!  I wish I could have been his female best friend like Mary Austin whom he wrote "Love Of My Life" for.  He bought her a house next door to his and upon his death bequeathed his mansion to her.  Maybe the truth is not much known about Freddie Mercury, some say that his off stage persona could be quiet - time spent with his beloved cats.  The movie Bohemian Rhapsody wasn't all that in depth or revealing.  Was he really so promiscuous and sordid?  Well I've been there, done that and I don't think that makes you a bad person; there could be emotional reasons behind it.  Or hell, it's just the typical rock star lifestyle.  We forgive our idols almost everything.

Now take Leonard Nimoy.  Spock is hot hot hot but Leonard was so much more than his character Mr. Spock.  Did you know he was an accomplished photographer and poet?  He was wildly creative and a prolific renaissance man (he also put out a couple of musical albums but let's try to forget about those).  Still, he was absolutely gorgeous and as Spock stole the hearts of millions of female fans.  Nimoy was uber cool!  He was politically active and fought for (liberal) causes.  He was a sexy Jew who struggled with alcoholism and an addiction to cigarettes and Haggen Das Coffee ice cream. Just like me he got sober in AA and was from Massachusetts.  He divorced his first wife late in their marriage and subsequently found and married his true soulmate Susan Bay Nimoy.  And did you know that one of the photography books he put out was a collection of naked overweight/big & beautiful women?  He loved to study the beauty of the female form in any size.  If you get a hold of his poetry you will see that it is the very antithesis of his famous Spock character.  Leonard Nimoy's poetry was all about love;  both romantic love and the humanity of love.  Some of his earlier work refers to us all as children, needy for love.  It really makes me want to know more about him and what made him tick.  Of course he was a workaholic and in his early career neglected his family, but tried to make up for that later in life.  Celebrity crushes have foibles too.  It was his cigarettes that killed him and it is a real tragedy that he was taken from this world so soon.  To sum it up, I have a real thing for Jewish men and he was as beautiful as they come, inside and out.

The other Jewish man I have a major crush on is of course Jesus.  I myself am neither Jewish nor Christian but I love all that he stands for.  And I have an interesting take on him, if a bit unconventional.  This is going to sounds nuts, not to mention blasphemous to some of you but I have had two psychics tell me that I had a past life as one of the people that surrounded Jesus.  Dare I hope an actual disciple?  Maybe I was just of that era but I feel like I actually did know him or at least was familiar with him somehow and that I loved him back then in biblical times.  Occasionally when I think of him dying on the cross, murdered, I get inexplicably sad and feel a tremendous loss.  Like the loss of a friend or loved one.  I even think that back then I was jealous that his love was not for one person but all of mankind.  I wanted him to myself.   I'm not so sure all the pictures of him are accurate but he must have been beautiful to look upon.  I can say this because while most people believe Jesus to be the son of God, I think he was more like a tremendous spiritual master, and a savior but not a necessarily a deity. Either way I am certain he existed and I am certain of the love he stands for.  I find him inspiring and it's not a bad thing to think What Would Jesus Do?  How can you not be attracted to someone who is all about love and tolerance and kindness?   He is the biggest celebrity of all, and yet probably the most accessible.  I know I can call upon his spirit for help.

These men are crushes because make me feel things but also because they are all hugely inspirational.  I want a man who inspires me, even who inspires others, although realistically on a much more human scale because unfortunately celebrity crushes are just a fantasy.  Especially like in my case when they are already dead.


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